I am often baffled at why to date in this journey I am on I have not really been mad at God. Disappointed? Yes! Confused? Yes! Mad? No (not yet anyway). Everything I have read about the grief process says that I will be. So I often get up and wonder-will today be the day? When God, when? Will it be when I see that pregnant lady walking down the street just glowing in the joy of pregnancy? Or will it come in June when I am out shopping and see mommies with their newborns? You know I can't avoid them babies are born everyday (Praise God). Babies are all around us! But when, when will the anger hit? Will it just hit me like a ton of bricks, I pray not. I am reading a wonderful newly released book by Angie Smith (she is the wife of Todd Smith of the Christian group Selah). There precious baby girl Audrey went to be with Jesus on April 7, 2008 and their testimony is AMAZING! I just love this passage from her book and pray that it will minister to others as well....
However easy it may be to allow myself to wail over my loss, it is a far more satisfying thing to believe that all of this is a brief season. The Lord I have placed my trust in tells me that I will see my Trevor again, and while he stands beside me, He weeps. He doesn't weep at the barren ground, nor does He mourn the browning branches. He cries because I can't see what he can. And in the fluttering of the breeze, with my heart pressed to His, I can hear him whisper, "Spring will come, my love."
What an amazing thing! Spring will come, my love! You will see your Trevor again, my love! Oh what a promise!
Joy in affliction is rooted in the hope of resurrection, but our experience of suffering also deepens the root of that hope.-John Piper
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